Excuse-Making Explored

Excuse-Making: An Interesting Concept

The human mind is remarkable and fascinating. It is capable of so much, maybe too much. This short opinion piece will explore the concept of excuse-making. More specifically, it will try to untangle the difference between excuses and genuine reasons as it might relate to the mental side of competitive sport and performance.

The Cambridge Dictionary defines an excuse (noun) as “an explanation that frees one from fault or blame.” So, excuse-making is the act of doing this, and habitual excuse-making is doing this a lot. When I read this definition, I was a little surprised. I was expecting it to be more about facts versus fiction. But apparently not. It appears as if excuses are more like the opposite of “taking responsibility” than about accuracy.

From a sport psychology and performance psychology point of view, it’s essential that we also separate excuse-making into the outward and inner types. By this, I mean saying something just to oneself (e.g., thoughts) designed to free the thinker from fault or blame is not the same as an excuse that is vocalised to another person (or group).

Spoken Words Are Actions, Not Thoughts

Technically speaking, when you open your mouth, and words come out, these are actions. Yes, these words probably started as thoughts. And yes, the time gap between having the thought and then doing the talking can feel so quick that we believe they are the same. But they are not the same. The reason why it’s so important not to confuse them comes down to the vastly different ways we want to handle thoughts, feelings, and actions, as explained in the video below.

If you take this explanation and put it into the context of inner excuse-making, then really, what we, as sport psychologists, are suggesting is to become more aware of just noticing these cognitions. Ideally, with practices like mindfulness and journaling, we can all become better at lengthening the gaps between the stimulus (the autonomic thought we have little influence over) and response (which action, if any, to take).

Because I am a diehard advocate for Psychological Flexibility as a better approach to sport, performance, life, and everything else, it’s easier to assume that I have no interest in influencing thought processes. This is not true.

Let Me Explain

Consider thoughts as either past, present, or future-oriented. The first two categories are ideally treated with extreme acceptance. Changing a past thought is impossible, and changing a present one is complicated and unnecessary for the critical stuff (actions) anyway, so leave them be.

But future thoughts are different. They have not taken place yet, so there are actions we can take that might lessen the burden on our psychological flexibility later.

Some clients will know I am a big fan of using swimming as an analogy, not just swimming but swimming in the ocean. One way to become a better ocean swimmer is to become more adept at doing your strokes whilst waves are smacking you in the jaw. We can do thousands of things to become stronger ocean swimmers. But at some point, we’d need to accept that looking at future sea conditions – to avoid the most extreme conditions that mother nature can throw at us – is also intelligent. Reduce the probability of extreme burden despite excellent preparation.

How do we reduce the burden on our psychological flexibility? There are many ways to do this, but there is no substitute for monitoring our efforts in the context of learning to make fewer excuses.

Example Please!

Peter has decided he wants to improve his short game in golf. So, instead of smashing balls at the range (which he finds much more enjoyable), he plans to use this time to work on this chipping instead. He decides to get specific and designs some drills that take 40 minutes, and he adds them to his time management plan to do this three times a week.

In simple mathematical terms, he’s aiming for 120 minutes a week of intentional effort. However, the amount of actual effort can range anywhere between 0 minutes and 120 minutes. Of course, it could go above 120 minutes, but this is less likely as Pete is somewhat of a “do what’s necessary kind of guy.”

Peter creates a simple chart to measure how many minutes he does each week. When this number is below 120 minutes, there is a space for him to put why he fell short. Below are three hypothetical entries – can you identify which (if any) are excuses?

Are These Excuses?

~ The practice pitching green was shut for some kids’ lessons on Wednesday evening, so I could not do my standard drills when I arrived. So, I went to the range instead and fell 40 minutes short of my short game practice this week.

~ I just experienced a considerable dip in motivation for my overall Golf, not just my short game. I played poorly on the weekend, so the idea of investing even more time into a pursuit that is so inconsistent seems ridiculous. Maybe a couple of weeks off is what is needed. I got 0 minutes done this week, 120 minutes less than my commitment.

~ Blast, I picked up a slight shoulder niggle whilst playing touch footy with the guys on Monday night. The physiotherapist instructed me to practice at least 20 minutes during every session (half my usual amount). I didn’t quite manage to double the number of sessions to get to the 120 minutes, so I managed 100 minutes this week instead of 120.

Instead of sharing my insights about which of the above contains more legitimacy than others, it might be more attractive to ask our loyal readers. Please add your comments in the space at the bottom of this article, and I will endeavour to reply to every one of them as they come through. Which of the above (if any) do you believe is an excuse and why?

The Mind Is Not So Different From The Body

Both benefit from some very similar rules. One commonality between the parts above and below the neck is that they both require repetition for changes to become permanent.

This simple monitoring process described above is the most effective method I have ever encountered during my 20 years as an applied sport psychologist in assisting future thoughts to become less burdensome. Let me reiterate something fundamental here to prevent the flurry of comments about me contradicting my preference for psychological flexibility while wanting my clients to have more beneficial future thoughts. Because they are future thoughts (yet to happen) and are potentially influenced by present actions, there is no risk of what we call meta-cognition “distracting” the performer during the present moment.

Ideally, weekly reflections on why an athlete or performer fell short build greater awareness of how they can creatively work towards greater consistency of practice in the future. Maybe the very simple little internal dialogue is something like this.

“It’s gonna be hard for me to practice this week due to the weather. What can I do instead of letting these adverse weather conditions reduce our intended practice? Maybe I could do something inside or practice in the rain, knowing my skin is waterproof. Better still, maybe this poor weather practice will help me when I have to compete in similarly adverse climatic conditions.”

Accepting Thoughts, Especially The Crappy Ones, Is Hard.

So, we’re looking to reduce the workload required for methods such as mindfulness. Developing great psychological flexibility is fantastic and will serve you very well in the future. Still, it is not a magic bullet that makes all future endeavours bulletproof against all challenges.

At the beginning of the article, I clarified that dialogue related to why we don’t manage to do what we intended to do is not the same as when we say this to another individual. What does this second version most commonly look like?

In a sporting context, it is probably most common in elite developmental sports programs. Imagine a softball team with athletes aged between 14 and 17. The coach helps the squad design a combination of group-based practice and tasks that the players must do independently.

A simple self-monitoring system allows the Coach to see which athletes are doing the individualised practice. For the players who don’t enter this data or enter numbers far less than what was agreed upon, conversations can occur about why.

Why would an athlete use an excuse verbally when, in their mind, they know it’s far from a legitimate reason? There are potentially many reasons, but the most common is a lack of sound team dynamics, as described in these past articles here and here.

If you are a sporting or non-sporting performer and would like some professional help with making fewer excuses, then contact us now via this Enquiry Form. One of our team will get back to you within a couple of days.